Insecurity is something I am very familiar with. Unfortunately, I can tell you all about it. Insecurity causes worry, fear, anger, depression, lonliness, low self-esteem, anxiety, frustration, jealousy, manipulation, to name just a few. If I am insecure, I am full of "me" thoughts. I hate to admit it, but I have been full of myself.
You see, I have always been insecure. Insecurity has been my lifelong friend. For as long as I can remember, I have battled this monster. From elementary thru High School, I always felt like I did not quite measure up. I specifically remember in my Jr. High years and into High School feeling so inadequate. My best friend seemed to me to be the more "popular" one. I remember thinking that some people who claimed to be my friend only did so because I was her best friend. Silly, I know! I was always uncomfortable being the center of attention in a "crowd". I avoided that if at all possible!
Today, as an adult, I still have those same battles. I am fairly confident when I am one on one with someone(on my good days), but get me in a group of people and ask me to share and I can't even think straight.
The enemy knows my weakness and makes sure there are plenty of opportunities in my life to try to keep this monster alive. God has been dealing with me on this for a while now. I know the key is trusting Him totally and completely. It sounds easy enough, right?
Bad news is I have trust issues and they affect every area of my life. Good news is God knows all about my "issues" and has a plan to set me free and use my weaknesses for His Glory! There is hope!
Trust equals security and confidence in my God. I do not have to be secure in any situation that I am in because HE is my security. I do not have to have confidence in myself.....because I am confident in HIM. I do not have to trust others, because trusting Him is enough. He did not call me to trust others but to love them. It's HIM I am to trust.
Hebrews 10:35-36 says Do not throw away your confidence, it will be rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God you will be rewarded. Satan wants us to throw away our confidence, to live in fear and insecurity. He knows that when we are insecure that we will not fulfill God's will for our life. God's plan is better. His word tells us He is our fortress, under His wings is safety and security.
Lord help me to trust YOU more and remain stable and fixed under the shadow of the Almighty. It's time for this monster to be exposed and eliminated in Jesus' name!
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